Lord, Wake Up!

“The occasion for struggle is the occasion for victory. We do not have to yield deliberately, and with the grace of God, we can always overcome.  Ask Him to rebuke the waves, to calm them, ask Him who in the boat stilled the furious sea with one word.”

 I Believe in Love pg. 92-93

When I think of Jesus asleep in the midst of a frenzied storm, I picture Him asleep within me as my passions explode during times of chaos in my home. Some days I feel just like the apostles must have felt. All around me the waves are stirring up. They are getting bigger and more powerful. The clouds are practically making it impossible to see. The noise becomes deafening and I cry out to Jesus in fear, “Lord, how can You sleep when I need You? Don’t You see that I am drowning? Any minute now and I will surely die!” Still some days, He appears to sleep on until I am practically drowned. Maybe I have drowned in my own fears and emotions! Why, Lord, do You leave me calling out to You while You slumber?

“He will not calm it right away, because these very struggles which humiliate us are precious, and if it were enough to say a little prayer to become instantly an angel of meekness, it would be too easy. Often He will leave you the trial, He will leave you the humiliation, but He will help you stay united to His will in the very center of the storm.”  

I Believe in Love pg. 93

It is true that when I cry out to Jesus to calm the passions of my soul or the passions in my home, He does not always do so promptly.  It is humiliating to me to see that at times of duress, I am not all sweetness and light, that I have to grow in patience and self-control, that ultimately, I need Christ more than I ever imagined. What a beautiful truth, if I can overcome my pride, and the fantasized image of the person I think I am when all is calm, to accept myself as a work in progress. Self knowledge, seen so starkly in the light of these very storms,  is a precious gift that keeps my feet solidly planted on the only path to heaven. And what of humility’s  little companion, perseverance, which can only grow through struggle?  Patient endurance not only purifies our souls of pride; but ultimately, Jesus uses it to calm the storms of our hearts.